Uber Unveils Another Loss, CEO Promises To Be Profitable "One Day, Can't Say When" [zero hedge]
Tesla, Inc. (TSLA)
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Source: zero hedge
Uber Unveils Another Loss, CEO Promises To Be Profitable "One Day, Can't Say When"Fuck, meet tard.Uber will be profitable when Mark Zuckerberg becomes a born again Christian gun owner.Or, when Elon Musk cashes in, and bank rolls an organic gardening co op.Or, when Barack Obama goes full Bruce Jenner with tits and all.Or, when Trump delivers on all his campaign promises, starting with " Lock her up. "Urban Mobility: Translation - moving money from Urban banks/VCs back to Uber HQ, then setting it on fire.So the company doesn't make money, the drivers don't make money... whatever. At least I can easily get home when I'm loaded.Uberlicious!Chasing that "feel-good" high that is very rarely achieved.Getting raped in a back of a seedy van by a paki is not what it used to be.Maybe only in Sweden.Wonder if the autopilot has a goat humping allahu-akbar or ASMR tingling voice.Meanwhile down under:Australian ASMR YouTuber FrivvyFox nude photos and video leakedhttps://celebrity-leaks.net/australia
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News
- India 'confident' new EV policy measures will allow more foreign players to enter market [MSNBC.com]MSNBC.com
- Tesla that fatally hit Washington motorcyclist may have been in autopilot; driver arrested [USA TODAY]USA TODAY
- Cathie Wood makes almost $100 million on battered tech stock [Yahoo! Finance]Yahoo! Finance
- Billionaire investor Ron Baron says Tesla stock has bottomed out and will 'go up huge' on the promise of more affordable vehicles [Yahoo! Finance]Yahoo! Finance
- Hertz is done gambling with EVs: It took a first-quarter $195 million hit on Teslas that just keep losing value and can't sell them fast enough [Yahoo! Finance]Yahoo! Finance
TSLA
Earnings
- 4/23/24 - Beat
TSLA
Sec Filings
- 4/25/24 - Form 144
- 4/25/24 - Form DEFA14A
- 4/24/24 - Form 10-Q
- TSLA's page on the SEC website